The Ultimate Modern MetroNeck Guide on “How not to stink!”

As a Modern MetroNeck, it is important to present yourself as somewhat of a refined gentleman in this rough and tumble world. You never get a second chance to make that first impression. That first impression can be ruined if you don’t put your best “SMELL” forward so to speak. A Modern MetroNeck has a duty to make sure he doesn’t offend with any odor that is anything but pleasant. What is the best cologne for men? What is the best body wash for men’s skin? What is the best soap for men’s body odor? This is the Ultimate Modern MetroNeck guide on “How not to Stink!” We will help you out.

Let’s face it. It takes work to make sure you are at your best MOST of the time. It is hard to stay on your game 24/7. There are certain habits that you can adopt as a Modern MetroNeck that will allow you to always put your best fragrance forward. It is never a good experience when you come into contact with someone that has that offensive odor coming from any part of themselves. Men don’t often worry themselves too much about how they might be sniffed. (You smell me?). What are some of the best grooming products for men? Check out these picks by the Modern MetroNeck on Amazon:

Duke Cannon Men’s Big Brick of Soap Set – Productivity, Naval Supremacy, Victory

4-in-1 Bar Soap, Functions as Hair Shampoo, Beard Shampoo, Body Wash 4oz

Duke Cannon”Great American Frontier” Men’s Big Brick of Soap Set: Fresh Cut Pine, Leaf & Leather, Campfire

When I was just a young MetroNeck I was considered shall we say HUSKY. That’s the proper word for big, large, big-boned, healthy. Whatever you want to call it I was reminded at an early age that I needed to wash myself every day and wear some deodorant to keep the stink away. Little grade school kids are mean as Hell so it only took once for you to be labeled “The Stinky Kid”. That’s why every day I made sure all my “Stink Zones” were squared away. Check out these picks by the Modern MetroNeck on Amazon:

Mistral Men’s Bourbon Vanilla Bar Soap, Bourbon Vanilla

Jack Black , Turbo Body Bar Scrubbing Soap, 6 oz

Redken Brews Cleansing Bar for Men, 5.2 Ounce (Pack of 2)

Dr. Squatch Shampoo + Conditioner Set – Eliminate Flakes, Dandruff, Dry Scalp, Prevent Hair Loss – All Natural Formula for Men – Organic Tea Tree Oil & Peppermint – Manly Scents (8 + 12 oz)

You might ask what are these “zones”? Well, you can break the “Stink Zones” down into five human body areas that produce foul odors if left unattended. They are breath, underarms, crotch, feet, and the backside (Azz). That means you must pay particular attention to all these areas daily.

The first rule on how not to stink: Wash you’re Azz every day. That’s right every single day of your life if you have access to running (or bottled) water then put it to good use and put some on you. Use some good soap too. There are some good “man soaps” out there just for you. Wash all your “Stink Zones” including your feet. Check out these picks by the Modern MetroNeck on Amazon:

Duke Cannon Tactical Soap On a Rope Pouch

Lather & Wood Shaving Soap – Sandalwood – Simply The Best Luxury Shaving Cream – Tallow – Dense Lather with Fantastic Scent for The Worlds Best Wet Shaving Routine. 4.6 oz (Sandelwood)

NIVEA Men DEEP Active Clean Body Wash – 8-hour Fresh Scent with Natural Charcoal – 16.9 fl. oz. Bottle (Pack of 3)

Don’t be lazy and decide that you “Don’t smell that bad”. NO, YOU DO! (Don’t want to be THE STINKY KID for Pete’s sake). If water is not accessible at the moment then use baby wipes, damp paper towels, Banana leaves, something that allows you to hit those zones. Wash your hair, (IF you have any left), and your feet to get rid of that foot funk. Try your best to reach all those “hard to reach places”. Believe me, people, with silently thank you for it.

The second rule on how not to stink: Brush your teeth…EVERYDAY. (Maybe three times a day). Most likely in the course of a day, you will converse with someone in close quarters. Nothing is worse than getting hit squarely in the nose with stinky, hot, foul, last night’s onion loaf, pickled garlic, funk breath. Check out these picks by the Modern MetroNeck on Amazon:

GIBS Grooming Man Wash BHB, 33.8 Fl Oz

Antifungal Tea Tree Oil Body Wash Soap for Men – Helps Athlete’s Foot, Toenail Fungus, Jock Itch, Eczema, Ringworm & Body Odors – Extra Strength Men’s Body Wash (2 Pack)

Crest Scope Outlast Mouthwash Long Lasting Peppermint

TheraBreath Gluten-Free Fresh Breath Oral Rinse, Icy Mint, 16 Ounce Bottle (Pack of 2)

Listerine Pocketmist Cool Mint, 2 Count

Now the onion loaf is good, don’t get me wrong, but the remnants the next morning can gag a maggot! You don’t want to offend when you are just sounding out your H’s. (H-E-A-R me dog?). Also, to add to that, floss your teeth on the regular and use some kind of mouthwash daily. This keeps that “TOSIS” away. You know halitosis which is the buildup of funk bacteria in your mouth. Kill that with a daily dose of attention to this zone. Trust me it will do wonders for conversation and your lady will love you for it.

Best cologne for men

The third rule on how not to stink: Wear deodorant…EVERYDAY. Put this on after completing step 1. Been wearing deodorant since I was a lower-case G (remember I was big-boned). Trust me you don’t want to skip it. There literally are thousands of kinds of sprays, gels, pastes, crystals, and roll-on deodorants that work extremely well. Experiment with them and find one that you like and works for you and stick with it. I find that the Gels last longer and work like they are supposed to. That’s just me. Roll-ons and paste work well but might leave some stains on your clothes. Check out these picks by the Modern MetroNeck on Amazon:

Every Man Jack Deodorant Twin Pack (Fresh Scent)

Gillette Antiperspirant & Deodorant for Men, Cool Wave Clear Gel, 3.8 Oz, Pack Of 4

Super Fresh Man Parts Ball Deodorant for Men by SweatBlock. Talc-Free Hygiene lotion-to-powder cream for fresh balls & body. Stops stickiness and odor, 4 fl oz tube

Fresh Balls Lotion for Men, 3.4 fl oz

The fourth rule on how not to stink: Wash your clothes on the regular. That’s right. It doesn’t matter if you wash your Azz if you put on funky smelling clothes. It’s like putting 10-day old tuna on a fresh cooked roast beef sandwich. You smell the tuna! Ooh, that’s bad! I don’t recommend it. Make sure you wear clothes no more than a couple of times before they hit the washing machine. If you sweat in those clothes then that’s a license to send them straight to the wash. You can hit a pair of blue jeans, a coat, or jacket with some spray freshener. Check out these picks by the Modern MetroNeck on Amazon:

Nautica Classic for Men by Nautica 3.4 oz 100ml EDT Spray

Nautica Nautica Voyage Sport Eau De Toilette Spray 3.4 Oz/ 100 Ml for Men By Nautica, 23 Fl Oz

Hugo Boss Eau de Toilette Natural Spray for Men, 4.2 Fl Oz

You can also toss them in the dryer and “revive them” with a dryer sheet, but make sure you give them the “deep smell test”. That’s where you hold that piece of clothing to your nose and breathe through it deeply to get a true whiff of the fabric. If it smells at all strange or offensive DON’T WEAR IT! Move on down the rack and find something that you know is clean.

Best cologne for men

The fifth rule on how not to stink: Wear socks with all your shoes. I didn’t say flip-flops or sandals or those stylish camo crocs you have. Shoes and boots need socks to make the dream work. Our feet naturally sweat and foot sweat is funky. There is no way around it. If you wear a pair of shoes a couple of times without socks, the foot funk starts to grow in that pair of shoes. The socks act as a sweat catcher and absorb all the moisture keeping our shoes or boots from getting it. I know what you are thinking. Check out these picks by the Modern MetroNeck on Amazon:

Odor Eaters Insoles Ultra-Durable (3 Pack)

Dr. Scholl’s ULTRACOOL Insoles // Triple Action: Odor Protection with Activated Charcoal, Cooling with Vents and Supportive Cushioning for All-Day Comfort (for Men’s 8-13)

Lotrimin AF Athlete’s Foot Deodorant Antifungal Powder Spray, Miconazole Nitrate 2%, Clinically Proven Effective Antifungal Treatment of Most AF, Jock Itch and Ringworm, 4.6 oz Spray Can (Pack of 3)

Who is going to smell my feet if I don’t take my shoes off? Believe me, there will be a time in the near future when you need to take your shoes off in the presence of another human being. That’s when that embarrassing foot funk will rear its ugly foot so to speak. The worst would be if you happen to take those shoes off in a car or other small enclosed area. Trust me the foot funk is more powerful than you think even if you can’t smell it.

Best cologne for men

The sixth rule on how not to stink: Get you some cologne and use it on the regular. The best cologne for men is the kind you WEAR! Just pick one that you think smells good, Better yet ask your lady if she likes it. If she likes it BINGO! That’s the one. Use a little bit of it every day just like the deodorant. Make putting on that cologne a part of your morning routine. Now notice I didn’t say bathe in it or splash it on all over. No just put a small amount on so that it gives off a faint hint of that sweet, pleasant smell that everyone will thank you for. Check out these picks by the Modern MetroNeck on Amazon:

Best After-shave Balm, Sandalwood Scent, Premium Aftershave Lotion, Soothes and Moisturizes Face after shaving, Does Not Dry The Skin, Eliminates Razor Burn For A Silky Smooth Finish …

Jack Black Post Shave Cooling Gel, 3.3 Fl Oz

Burt’s Bees Natural Skin Care for Men, Aftershave, 2.5 Ounces (Pack of 3)

Women will pay attention to it believe me. If you put too much on then they think you are just trying too hard. Too much cologne can be just as bad and offensive as the funk. Don’t do it! Also, there are somebody sprays on the market now for men that seem to do the trick. Find one you like and try it out. The cologne or body spray in addition to the deodorant is a recipe for sweet-smelling success. Let me repeat the best cologne for men is the one you actually WEAR!

Best cologne for men

As a Modern MetroNeck if you follow these simple rules for how not to stink, and you repeat, repeat, repeat, you will make sure that the impression you put out into the world will be a good one. Even if you used to be the “Stinky Kid” back in the fifth grade, you can break the cycle and become a true Modern MetroNeck with that sweet smell of success. Make sure you have all the smell zones “squared away” as not to offend the people but become a man of the people.

Read Next: https://modernmetroneckguide.com/grilling-modern-metroneck/best-smokers-for-beginners/

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